Personality Traits and Jodi Arias

I’ve been following the current trial of Jodi Arias, for those who aren’t familiar with this case, check out this link

There are forums on Facebook and people have been blogging on her case as well.

I have been following this blogger lala1966 and today’s blog really nailed it for me as to the best way to describe what I see of this woman and the death of Travis Alexander

The other thing that has surfaced for me, is the similar behaviorial triats I see in Jodi Arias and myself. I’m sure others who have been abused or have a mental illness may feel some similarity as well. However, I don’t like how she appears to have gone through abusive relationships if in fact she hasn’t. I have, more than once, and it is no walk in the park! I have no doubt she is a sociopath and narcissist. But I also see what appears to be borderline personality traits.

I know for me emotionally, I have the ability to shut down all emotion when triggered into an altercation with someone. My therapist has seen it first hand. Yet, I have compassion for others and animals, whereas the defendant, Jodi Arias, doesn’t appear to show emotion, UNLESS it is in regards to herself.

For me, emotionally, a long time ago I remember what it was like to feel tears and feel sad about stuff. Now I feel stuff inside that feels like it is boiling and wants to come out but doesn’t. When I watch Jodi and the tears roll down her face, I also see how quickly they go away and hardly a sniffle or plugged nose in catching her breath. That I do find uncomfortable. I find it uncomfortable because I can’t imagine showing emotions such as crying at any level and not having some residual appearance as a result of crying. Red eyes, puffy eyes, stuffy nose, flushed face. She doesn’t show any of that!

I have realized one thing though, that my passion for the law still does exist. I’ve not worked in a legal office for about 10 years now and had given it up for various personal reasons. Yet, I watch this trial, as I have with other trials and the desire is still present! This actually excited me.

I’ve felt stripped of not knowing “who I am”. That is something BPD does want to strip from you. The ability to know who you are, something I am in the process of learning. So to see that I am intrigued and feel passion for a career I loved so much, reminds me that it is a piece of who I am. A legal secretary. I doubt I will go back to the field because you now have to go back to college to ascertain a legal certificate, back when I was a graduate from high school, a diploma was all you required. Mind you, I would like to feel confident in giving myself some type of permission to socialize, let alone going to work. I’ve not had the best work history, the longest I ever worked was 2 1/2 years and that was at my first legal secretary job, fresh out of high school.

Not sure how I feel about posting what I feel are my similarities to a woman who is on the stand for stabbing her boyfriend/lover 29 times, nearly decapitating him and then shooting him. Makes me wonder if I would have ever resorted to that kind of behavior had I not gotten treatment.



6 thoughts on “Personality Traits and Jodi Arias

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