First I must thank my friend katiecoolady for the photo above. For those who haven’t checked out her blog, you really should. Here is her link http://twoinnocents.wordpress.com/2014/03/23/quick-update/.
I apologize for not updating since my last post which was about my feeling out of body (or as some call disassociating) from the 3 car fatality last weekend, March 15, 2014.
I’ve been trying to process my visions and feelings around all of this. I’ve been updated and can say that all who were transported to the hospital, (minus the deceased) have now gone home, and the 4 dogs involved are home safe with their families. My spouse and I took flowers to the cross that had been set up by someone (which is right across from my home).
I experience Anxiety to sirens now. I have to talk myself down and remind myself my feet are on the ground and that the sounds will pass. That has never happened before.
I’m between group therapy sessions right now, so my weekly sessions aren’t happening. The first opportunity is April 23,2014.
I’m home a lot, I’ve struggled with getting outside and doing things other than what my brain has decided is ok. So I have given myself permission to garden, go to the store, doctor, appointments, stuff like that. But, social settings I won’t go by myself, and if I were, I stand somewhere where I I’m invisible.I often wonder if I will have balance and ability to go to the beach, sit on a log and watch the sun set and just know that everything will be ok?
We have had a dynamic change with not having 2 vehicles right now. I’ve experienced a huge trigger that I wasn’t expecting, but I’m trying to deal with it as best I can.
The other thing I have been working on is my senior dog Tika’s fundraising page on YouCaring. You can click on Tika’s Fundraising link here http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/help-tika-eat-without-pain/143569 so share and donate. I also post updates. I will be honest, It hasn’t been going very well. I decided to create a Facebook page to help share the importance of dental hygiene for your pet, I’m hopeful that there will be some increased shares. Teeth for Tika’s Facebook page can be found here https://www.facebook.com/pages/Teeth-for-Tika/436711099808170
So in an attempts to change what I do have control over, I spent some time at my local home hardware store and bought a new bird feeder as well as garden hose and window washer as I am gearing up to wash my outside windows before I put in new soil to help raise existing soil for gardening. Winters here are quite wet and it isn’t unusual to rototiller and mix last season and this season before planting.
I’d like to take a moment and thank the followers who have joined my blog in the recent weeks. It gives me courage to know that what my life is like makes a difference and my hope is it helps someone else out there.
Well I’m off on this slightly sunny Monday afternoon, to enjoy a cup of tea or my raspberry/strawberry smoothie I made. I plan on sitting near my fish tank and enjoying my hard work I did on it yesterday, to seeing the new babies :). My bird feeder has been busy too!